That Was Easy



          Leo was tired of quests. He was tired of ghosts. He was tired of giants. All he wanted was to be with Hazel, but big old Frank was in the way like a fat barricade. He wanted to make them break up, but he wasn't that cruel. He'd just have to wait and see and hope the Fates were on his side. Like Nationwide. Leo smirked.

          He crept to Frank's cabin to set an embarrassing trap for him. It was a new one that he had been working on for weeks, and it was sure to embarrass Frank with a flair that was uniquely Leo. Maybe it would show Hazel how big of a loser Frank was. As he approached the door, he heard talking inside. It was inaudible at first; he reached into his tool belt and pulled out a glass. Putting it up against the door, the voices became clear.

"Frank." It was Hazel, and Leo could tell she was not in a good state.

          I guess State Farm wasn't there, Leo thought.

          Some rustling was heard.

          "Why are you taking out my wood?"

          Leo readjusted himself outside the door. His legs were falling asleep, and it wouldn't do for his legs to buckle and give away his position.

          "Frank, sit down."

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          "Hazel, what's going on?  Is something wrong?"

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          "I 'm sorry, but after what happened, I don't trust myself to handle your lifeline anymore an-and I do-don't deserve to be your girlfriend.  Gods, I hardly deserve to be your friend!"

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          "What?" said Frank, and Leo could tell he was confused.

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          "Again, I'm sorry, but I have to say that I can't continue this relationship with you.  Goodbye, Frank," she said emotionlessly.

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          "What did you say?" The words came out slurred so fast; they sounded more like "Whdjya thsay?"

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          "Do I have to repeat myself?  This is hard enough as it is, saying this to you, I don't want to say it again, but if you insist,–

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          "I do not insist!" Frank freaked.

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          "– I am breaking up with you!" she finished, her voice sounding as if she was about to cry.

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          "Wha... wha...  You don't mean... we're over?"

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          Hearing heavy footsteps, Leo lunged backwards, and just in time, too. Frank's door seemed to explode out of its frame as Frank busted through in his rage. Idiot, Leo thought. Now you don't even have a door. He didn't even have to lift a finger to break up Frank and Hazel!

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          Leo was astounded. That was easy. Some revolutionary god must have invented Staples just for the "that was easy" button, he thought wryly.

<p class="MsoNormalCxSpMiddle"><span style="font-size:16.0pt;line-height:115%; font-family:"TimesNewRoman","serif"">          "WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?  IT'S AFTER CURFEW, AND IF I SEE THIS HAPPENING ONE MORE TIME, YOU ARE GOING TO GET YOUR BUTTS WHUPPED, YOU HEAR!"